It's time to wine down.
When life throws you a lemon, have a glass of wine.
Age gets better with wine. I'll drink to that.
A friend of wine is a friend of mine.
It's wine o'clock somewhere.
Lots has been said about making America grape again.
Save water ... Drink wine.
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.
Good wine makes for good neighbors.
Wine — liquid therapy.
A good glass of wine is good for your health and the leftover bottle is good for your morale.
Wine cheer — " Sip, sip hooray."
I'm on cloud wine.
Have a glass of wine. Don't keep things bottled up.
Seven days without wine makes one weak.
They say that wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.
I drink coffee because I need it. I drink wine because I deserve it.
If you can't be with the wine you love, then love the wine you're with.
Friends don't let friends wine alone.
A wine lovers emergency call — Wine-one-one.
I was told I needed glasses. So, I had glasses of wine, glasses of scotch and glasses of rum.
With wine, "sip" happens.
Are you well red?
Rodney Dangerfield declared that he cooked with wine and even added it to some food.
I don't like winey and cheese people, but I do like wine and cheese.
Running out of wine is my cardio. And sometimes I make "pour" decisions.
I'm here for the right Riesling.
Even on the TV show "The Batchelor," the question is "Will you accept this 'Rose?'"
Uncork and relax. Wine a little and laugh a lot. You had me a Merlot.
It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full, there is clearly room for more wine.
I tried to cook with wine, but it didn't go well. After five glasses, I forgot why I was in the kitchen.
Wine is much like this newspaper. It's red all over.
Patrick McAlpine is a self-described “edutainer” and a Canadian Snowbird from Kanata, Ontario, Canada. Submit your jokes or smiles to email@example.com.